Have you read any of Lisa Genova’s books? If you have, you know they tend to be both fascinating and disturbing. I would encourage you to read her books, though, in my humble opinion, they are probably not the type of book you would want to read during a time of isolation.
This morning, while walking the first laps of my daily Camino on my indoor circuit, a phrase from her book Left Neglected which I read weeks prior to the pandemic, sprang to mind: “normal is overrated.” In her book, Lisa Genova tells a story of resilience in the face of a devastating diagnosis. After a car crash the protagonist, Sarah Nickerson, a career-driven supermom in her thirties, is left with a traumatic brain disorder called “left neglect.” Sarah’s brain injury completely erases the entire left side of her world. With incredible willpower and endless therapies, she eventually regains some of her mobility. Then one day she joins her husband and two children on a skiing trip. No longer able to ski with her family she sits and watches them from the lobby of the hotel. Her trusty cane in hand, she goes to check out the rental place for skis and snowboards. Here Sarah meets a man who inadvertently changes her attitude about her life she no longer considers to be normal. The man offers to teach her snowboarding on boards adapted for folks with disabilities. After much coaxing, she agrees to give it a try. As she begins to gain confidence on the slopes, she learns how to remain upright and maneuver a snowboard. After a few tumbles, she begins to complain about how clumsy and awkward she is, adding, “This isn’t normal. This isn’t how you snowboard.” Her tutor’s response, “What’s normal anyway? Normal is overrated if you ask me” changes Sarah’s life. Normal’s overrated. (Left Neglected, Lisa Genova)
Well, here we are, still in lockdown, and far removed from what we used to call normal, considered to be normal. Here it is yet again, that word, that concept of the normal. Again, and again we question our need for a new normal. Yes, the old was overrated. Since we agree on that, what then are the practicalities that will ensure a new normal?
“Some say normal is for people without any courage.”
I am beginning to sound like a broken record. Maybe that’s okay, lots of things are broken these days. What is it with this abnormal normal to which I keep returning? Is it because that old normal was familiar and to a certain degree felt comfortable like an old pair of shoes? Is it because they fit comfortably without too much thought given to why we don’t do things differently? Is it because the new and unfamiliar will be challenging, possibly downright scary? Some say normal is for people without any courage. Others say normal is boring. Collectively we are saying our former lives were not normal, yet many want it back. Surely it is not because they lack courage or are boring. It sounds as if we are caught between a rock and a hard place, midway between what was and is not yet. Is it the fear of the unknown and how we might get there? We are faced with a puzzling and disturbing paradox. We feel comfortable and secure in our familiar normal, and yet we say it is overrated, needs to be changed, sigh. We know how hard it is for all of us during this pandemic but especially for the children when everything in our normal lives has been disrupted. So where do we go from here? While writing this blog, I received an email from Thomas Hübl advertising his upcoming series, “Building Blocks for a New Culture.” I was struck by this topic: “The Global Rite of Passage – Who will We Choose to Be.” Yes, who?
- Sr. Magdalena Vogt, cps