Still comfortable?

While keeping watch at the bedside of a dying friend, the nurse’s question, “is she still comfortable?” rings out at intervals. Though obviously well intended, oddly, this question jars my soul. How can there be anything 'comfortable' about dying, I ask myself. Like a persistent earworm, I cannot quell the question. 'Still comfortable?' gnaws at my heart.

Caring family and friends surround this woman we love, offering each other comfort during this painful time. There it is again, ‘comfort’. It brings to mind the profound question Paula D'Arcy recently posed during her Kings College lecture, Divine Love in Challenging Times. "What if you can meet pain and find it is a doorway to the real God?"

That is the question, “what if you can?” Life is often not comfortable. We all experience heart wrenching pain and loss at some time in our lives. We all grieve. As Paula reminded us, "grief puts you into a new universe”. What sustains you and me in this new, not very comfortable universe? Do those times of darkness offer hidden treasure? They do, if we let them. When we slow down, our eyes open to look at life, to really see and pay attention to what is there. We will become aware that pain teaches us, that it is a doorway. When we step through it, we will discover that if we really know and walk with God, nothing can defeat us. We will find that divine love surrounds us in those challenging times.

Have you ever used one of those trusty Singer sewing machines? If you did, you will have vivid memories of the intricacy of threading your machine. According to Paula, threading a sewing machine is a great analogy for learning how to thread the machine of our lives. As a young child she was eager to learn how to sew a dress. One day, fabric and pattern in hand, off she went to a teacher in the hope of sewing that dress. Yes, you guessed it. The entire first lesson was devoted to learning the intricacies of threading the machine. It was not comfortable. However, that lesson many years ago proved to be a life lesson on the importance of threading the machine of life with love and compassion. If we thread it carefully with an abundance of love and compassion for ourselves and others, then when the thread on the spool of our life comes to its end, we will cross the threshold with a measure of comfort.    

So here we are, friends gathered at the bedside of a woman we cherish. She is about to cross the threshold into a new life. Over the past eighty years, she has threaded the machine of her life with great love and care. Now she is painfully stitching the last threads of her life’s tapestry. As I watch the slender oxygen tube which makes my friend’s final breaths more comfortable, I am reminded of the thread of her life so intricately interwoven with ours. All is peaceful. There is nothing to fear.

Inspired by the life my friend has lived, I recall a question the great poet Mary Oliver posed, “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” Will you thread the machine of your life with love and tenderness? When we do, on that final day, we will find comfort.  

Guest Blogger: Sr. Magdalena Vogt, cps

Thankfulness!

Thanksgiving weekend has just passed. Does thankfulness linger in your mind and heart? From the moment of awakening until we fall asleep, we are gifted in so many ways each and every day. All is gift. Gracious living means not taking God, people or things for granted. From God’s abundant goodness we have all received. Each moment is a precious gift from God. We enter this world and leave this world poor in spirit. To be human means to need other people for survival. Through life’s ups and downs, an attitude of gratitude can help a person maintain inner peace. The practice of counting one’s blessings results in contentment. With open hands and hearts, we can consciously choose to gratefully receive the countless graces our loving God bestows upon us, leading us to the fullness of life.   

Every day so many people’s presence, words and deeds contribute to our wellbeing. It is humbling to consider this fact. When we sincerely express our appreciation for others, we are acknowledging our interconnectedness. By saying “thank you,” we are telling another person their life blesses our own and makes a positive difference in our world. Living our life from this perspective of thankfulness accentuates what is going well. Keeping a gratitude journal can help us to keep our focus on how truly blessed you and I are. Awareness of how incredibly enriched our own lives are because of God’s goodness, our hearts can be moved to reach out to others and give to persons in need. 

I recommend viewing the meaningful TED talk below by David Steindl-Rast entitled: “Want to be Happy? Be Grateful.”

Kathleen O’Keefe CSJ

If Music Be the Food of Love, Play On!

At our residence this summer, we have been fortunate to have as our guest a seasoned professional cellist, Christiane McKee.  For enjoyment and to maintain her skills, she is part of a string quartet whose members play together weekly for what she calls “practice”.  However, listening to their magnificent chamber music, it is clear that they are professionals at work.  Recently, the group came to “practice” in our front foyer.  As their dulcet tones wafted through the halls, an audience was drawn to the music as if a magnet had pulled them.

In addition to Christiane as cellist, the other instrumentalists were Tom Hart and Cathy Mallory on violin and Dr. Mo Genner playing viola. Listening to their repertoire which consisted of selections from Hayden, Schubert and Mozart brought joy to our home on what would have been a rather ordinary Wednesday morning.  How heartwarming it was to hear skilled musicians play beautiful classical music just for the love of it. In Shakespeare’s words, it was indeed “music with her silver sound.”

Jean Moylan CSJ

PLAY – I Dare You!

“Where there is play, there is infinite possibilities.” A number of commercials are really pushing the idea of “play” trying to release us into the outdoors and away from our electric gadgets. These commercials bring us back to the golden years of our childhood (at least those of us who are seventy and more). 

Remember skipping, double Dutch, marbles, street hockey (when cars didn’t drive fast and were willing to move over), baseball games (including kids and parents), hide and seek, especially after the street lights came on. Coaches were parents sitting on the porch, hollering encouragement and refereeing.

Unfortunately much of our time has been taken over by gadgets that serve to exercise only our fingers. Chores use to be decided by rock, paper, scissors, not by lists on the computer. You didn’t need watches because when the street lights came on, it was time to come in and play a game of cards or checkers, with the radio playing (“The Shadow Knows” or “The Green Hornet”) in the background.

Summer is running away from us. Outdoor play is not just for children.  How can we play outdoors (running bases is kind of out)? Walking, sitting on the porch and playing “I spy”, maybe use a two wheel bike.  Even sit out in the fresh air chatting with some friends. Let’s exercise the infinite possibility of play. Don’t let the rapid movement of summer rob you of playtime.

If we turn the ‘L’ in play to an ‘R’, it becomes pray. Pray also has possibilities. Let’s combine the two activities pray and play! Won’t God be pleasantly surprised!

Sr. Barbara Vaughan

Outside, Inside the Box Thinking

"In God’s Womb: A Journey with yourself and God."

 When I first read Edwina Gately’s words on the flyer advertising her day of retreat, I was somewhat overwhelmed.  To be a co-creator of God!  A tall order, or as Edwina writes ‘an enormous task.’ However, I wanted to learn more about co-creating with God. I mean, really, God needs me to help God create?

From the time Edwina was introduced that Saturday morning at Kings College, I knew I was in for a treat. It immediately was evident that this wise woman, whom some call a mystic, and who has travelled the world, has vast experience.

Her unique manner of presentation, and her wonderful sense of humour were evident from the moment she began our day together. We all instantly knew it would be a day of great soul food which would also challenge our minds. She was definitely going to invite us to think outside the box. When she invited us “to look at all that has gone before us, and to recognize that each one of us, however small, has a unique task in co-creation” my heart nearly skipped a beat. So what is this task of each one of us? 

As I continue to reflect, Edwina’s latest book of poetry Soul Whispers inspires me to continue to look outside the box, deep within myself. Just as the healthy food inside our lunch box sustained me that day, Edwina’s image of my life’s journey inside God’s womb, is in the forefront of my mind, and tucked into my heart. Her question ‘who is God for you’ still resonates within. Instantly I recall the image of God I used to have. In my younger years God and happiness were never synonymous. God was a stern judge … ’do as you’re told, be obedient’ are words that used to echo through my soul. Thankfully I no longer have this image. 

Edwina’s suggestion to see God as a great seducer, ever inviting me deeper into a journey of intimacy, has stayed with me. Along with caterpillars, the sod, the animals, the birds, every man and woman I am part of an interconnected interrelated cosmos. In God’s womb we are one. As a co-creator, God has mandated me, all of us, to care not only for the dear neighbour, but for our common home, mother earth. In light of the recently published encyclical Laudato Si by Pope Francis, I renew my personal commitment to be a loyal faithful co-creator of God’s wonderful earth.

Loretta Hagen, csj